What actually causes IBS and mindbody syndromes

For years, I tried everything to fix my chronic symptoms—diets, supplements, naturopaths, specialists. I was told I had IBS, high cortisol, anxiety, hormone imbalance... but no one could explain why my symptoms kept returning, or why some days felt impossible even when I was "doing everything right."

Eventually, I discovered that my symptoms weren’t just physical—they were my nervous system’s way of asking for help. Quietly, persistently, wisely.

In this post, I want to share what I’ve learned about nervous system dysregulation—what causes it, how it shows up, and why so many of us with invisible chronic symptoms have more in common than we realize.

Nervous System Dysregulation: The Invisible Root of Mindbody Syndromes

Our nervous system is designed to help us survive. When we face something stressful, our body shifts into a state of sympathetic arousal—fight, flight, or freeze. Ideally, we complete that response and return to a calm, safe state (called ventral vagal). But when our body can’t complete the cycle—due to chronic stress, trauma, or emotional invalidation—it gets stuck.

Over time, this creates nervous system dysregulation—a state where the body is chronically on edge or shutdown, even when there’s no immediate danger. And because the nervous system governs everything—digestion, breathing, circulation, muscle tone, immune response—it makes sense that when it’s out of balance, we start to feel it everywhere.

For me, it wasn’t just anxiety or IBS. I had strange symptoms that no one could explain—chronic pain, jaw tension, days where I felt like I couldn’t take a full breath.

The nervous system is neuroplastic, meaning it learns quickly. But when it learns to stay in a protective, high-alert state, that pattern becomes hardwired. It becomes the new “normal.” And that’s how chronic symptoms take hold: fatigue, headaches, gut issues, muscle pain. These are known as mindbody syndromes—not because they’re imagined, but because they reflect the real, physical imprint of a mindbody wound.

It’s not “all in your head.” It’s in your protective wiring—and the good news is, wiring can change.

The Personality Patterns That Sneak In

If you’ve ever said:

• “I don’t want to be a burden.”

• “I just want to get it right.”

• “I’ll deal with it later.”

Then chances are, you’ve been operating with a nervous system that doesn’t feel fully safe.

Most of us with chronic symptoms share some of these patterns:

• Perfectionism (must get it right)

• People-pleasing (don’t rock the boat)

• Hyper-independence (don’t need help)

• Emotional sensitivity (deeply affected by tone, tension, or mood changes)

I used to think these traits made me a “good person.” But I now realize that they're just another symptom to a psychological wound that hasn't been resolved and a nervous system that's still always scanning for how to stay safe by being good, helpful, or invisible.

Childhood Attunement: The Blueprint We Carry

Let’s go deeper.

I believe that a lot of us (me for sure!) are caught in this dysregulation loop due to unresolved trauma from the past. Attunement—the way our caregivers responded (or didn’t respond) to our emotions during childhood is a strong predictor of mindbody syndromes.

Picture this: A little girl comes home from school, holding back tears. Someone was mean to her. An attuned parent might gently kneel, open their arms, and say: “I’m here. You look upset, sweetie. You can tell me everything.” The child feels seen. Held. Safe to feel. Her nervous system will eventually returns to regulation.

Now imagine a different response: “You’re being dramatic. It’s not that serious.” Or worse, silence.

The child still feels pain—but now, she also feels alone in it.

If this happens often enough, she learns: My emotions are too much. Or I should handle this on my own. Or only happy, easy versions of me get love.

These become attachment wounds—and they don’t just shape our relationships. They shape our biology.

In the 1960s, a psychologist named Harry Harlow ran a famous experiment with baby monkeys. They had two “mothers”: one made of wire that gave food, and one soft and cuddly but with no food. Guess which one the babies clung to? The soft one. Every time.

That study showed something many of us know intuitively: connection and emotional safety are just as important as food and water!! Without attunement and emotional safety, the body cannot function healthily.

This Isn’t Your Fault—But It Can Be Your Turning Point

If you’re reading this and thinking, “That’s me,” I want to gently tell you something:

You are not broken. Your symptoms are not random. They’re the body’s way of saying:

Please slow down. Please help me heal.

The path to healing isn’t just managing or fixing symptoms. It’s learning how to listen to them—and create safety from the inside out.

Tools like somatic work, parts work, nervous system retraining, and attuned connection can help you rewire the pattern—not by force, but by finally giving your system what it’s been missing.

This is the journey I’m on. Slowly. Gently. With so much compassion.

I’ll be sharing more of that in future posts.

But for now, please know that:

You are allowed to rest.You are allowed to feel.You are allowed to heal.

And your body hasn’t betrayed you—it’s been trying to protect you all along.

And if you're looking for some personalized help book a 1:1 session with me here. I'd love to be part of your healing journey!

With warmth and belief in your healing,

Cam